Day 0 – The Awakening

I haven’t read it. I thought it up in about four and a half seconds at the start and made it completely up on the spot. It’s shit. I’ve worked 50 hrs this week and my brain is dead. Combined with the fact that it’s actually a terrible idea. I apologise. But here it is and it’s before midnight. So lets start with hopefully the worst thing I’ll ever write.


Word count: 1148.



Day 0 – The Awakening





It was that whisper of time between consciousness and sleep. A breeze brushed across his skin, just cold enough to keep him from falling down the rabbit hole.


It was dark. Perhaps there were a few stars in the sky. Maybe it was even a full moon. Alex didn’t know. He hadn’t left the house in days. He’d barely eaten; he couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen the sun. It might have occasionally streamed in through the windows, but he had no conscious memory of it. He had no time for such mundane thoughts. There was little room left in his brain for such trivialities.


Alex turned over, his left side was getting a little numb. He could feel it about to happen. His heart rate quickened slightly. Something was gripping his heart, something heavy, something solid. Like a magnet, he was drawn to it: and this time he would go wherever it would take him…


Alex had been here before. Just once. It was all too familiar, the free-fall feeling he was now experiencing inside his head. His braincells thudded against his skull. Almost agony, almost bliss. He felt sick; he felt as if he were near to death. It was exactly as before.



Three days ago it had happened. It was at night. He was maybe a second away from sleep when he felt the same sickness he was feeling now. As he lay there, he felt something awaken inside of him. He heard screaming and voices; he heard machines and a dull hum. But it wasn’t from inside the room. It wasn’t from some distant television, radio. It sounded more real; more real than anything he’d ever heard. He could feel its raw grizzly grip on his eardrum. And the heat; the heat that melted his very skin. It was buzzing in his brain. And then he heard it. A whisper of purist clarity.






He was wrenched from his darkest consciousness, like a man saved from drowning in a stormy sea. His mind was wrecked; ruined and fragile. He could barely see a few centimetres before him. Any light scarred the back of his retina. But he knew; he that from wherever he had just come from, he knew that that voice was real. He could still hear it resonating inside his eardrum. From whatever place he had so suddenly returned from, he knew in an instant that the world he could now only just begin to see had changed. It somehow felt more fluid, less definite. And from wherever that voice that had so softly spoken his name had come from, he could not guess…for there was no one else around at all.


For three solid days he could not concentrate on anything but the brief memories of what he had felt, what he had seen – if indeed he had seen anything at all. He felt mad. He had locked all the doors in his house. He had shut out the outside world; the old world. He closed his mind to it all: to his life, his job, his body. They were now all meaningless.



Despite the pain, despite how it had made his mind almost shatter with stress and agony, Alex wanted it to happen again. He prayed and begged for a god he barely believed in for it to happen again. His mind was saturated with thought. His heart was racing. It was constant, like a drug. He needed it to happen again. He couldn’t live with himself if it didn’t.



And now it was. Alex was tense. He couldn’t relax. He felt sick with awe and wonderment. For days he had been wondering what lay beyond what he had seen. His thoughts hurtled through his mind. He was almost blinded by them. He couldn’t see where he was being led. It felt like he was walking along a quiet country lane, late at night. There was no light save the tiniest of torches far in the distance.


All of a sudden he could feel himself being pulled further in. He focussed further on the road. He was wearing nothing at all. It was almost as if he was stripping himself from all that he knew. Barefoot, he stepped out into the darkness and began to walk. His head was swimming in pain. Alex could feel the warmth again, could feel it starting to singe the hairs his arms…he was close.





It was the same voice.


Still on the country road, he turned. He could see and feel the voice all around him. It lit up the sky – greens and ambers; a thunderstorm of colour reacting to his name. Snow capped mountains were illuminated by the lightning and he could see that he was standing in a wide valley. Dead trees lined the country path. Further out still he could see the tiny glimmers of light growing. And now Alex wasn’t sure whether he was walking towards them, or simply that the world was turning underneath his feet and that the horizon was, in fact, coming his way instead.




Again. The clouds were lit up with a bombardment of colour. Reds and blue this time.


A forest of dead trees hurtled passed him now. Their twisted, decaying branches whipped passed him and broke open the skin on his arm. He looked down with shock and awe; there was no blood. There wasn’t anything: what was there was now replaced with a deepest black. And it was growing. It was growing rapidly.


The hole was growing with carnivorous fury. It seemed to almost explode and break out of his arm. The whole world, which had spun underneath his feet til now, suddenly stopped and started to recoil and be sucked into it.


Alex stood there, gasping for every breath as he saw the entire world collapse on him. He tried to pull out, he tried to escape to grasp his way back to reality; back to his bed; back to his life, his job, his world. But he couldn’t. He was being sucked in himself. There was no going back from here. This was too far. This was no nightmare from which he would wake.


And then suddenly once more….




And it all stopped. The world went black. It all fell silent. The burning in his head had vanished; the sickness; the desire. It was all gone; all dead. The only thing he could feel was his heart smashing against the inside of his chest. The rest was now just an endless black. It might have gone on for eternity. It might have just been to the ends of his arms.

And then – just before the end – one last breath of a voice floated across the vast nothingness….


“He’s gone now…. he’s at peace….”



~ by S.G. Mark on October 7, 2011.

7 Responses to “Day 0 – The Awakening”

  1. 1148 WORDS!!! that’s like a million words!

    Okay I’m going to read it now.

  2. you’re going to feel as if it’s a million words by the time you get through it… it’s horrendously dull and nothing actually happens and i basically started rewriting it about an hour ago

  3. It’s pretty good. Makes me want to play Alan Wake again.

  4. had to google Alan Wake. Why are all semi-good sounding games only released on xbox?

    pretty good? that actually made me laugh out loud.

  5. Top marks for descriptive quality, tho story itself didn’t grip sufficiently.

  6. As Ben said, the description in this story is excellent, especially the imagery. However, I was left with a lot of questions at the end and no answers. Was Alex having a heart attack? That was my first thought because of all the references to arms and the left side of his body, although the more I read, the less certain I was. Why a rabbit hole? I would also have liked some clues as to whom the voice belonged to. While “the outside world” may not mean anything to Alex anymore, I felt as if it must have meant a lot to the Voice. At any rate, intriguing! Also, as much as I hate reading over my own stories when I’m not happy with them, it is always a good idea. ;0) I noticed a few grammar/spelling mistakes: “braincells” (two words); “But he knew; he that from wherever he had just come from” (think you’ve changed the sentence here and then forgotten to remove a word or two from the old one); “hurtled passed” (past); “he tried to escape to grasp his way back to reality” (missing punctuation marks). There might be a few more I’ve missed, but these were the ones that stuck out. Anyway, an interesting read – I enjoyed it but am now very confused. :0) If that was your intention, feel free to ignore most of my comments! It certainly made me think.

    • Absolutely fair point on everything you say there. I have to admit that my first story was done on a headache and not really thinking ahead. It was hard getting used to writing the story and to a deadline. By the end of it, I just wanted to get it out there and published, so I finished it quickly. I couldn’t honestly tell you much about what the plot was or where it might have been going.

      As to the grammar. I never edit over my work – because I’d either delete it or give up. But I especially don’t edit these works because i usually start and finish them about half ten and there’s about 15 minutes to read over and publish! Once it turns midnight, I cannot edit them. I don’t care too much for the grammar though – as I know what I meant and I know where things should have gone if there’s a mistake. I do tend to think more of my sentences now (if I have the time/no headache) before writing them. But this whole project is more about stimulating the ideas and characters, the plots and the imagination that I can tap rather than spelling mistakes and punctuation.

      At any rate, thank you for finally reading them!!!!!! It takes a lot of commitment to write them so it’s always great when someone reads them 🙂 x x

      All I can say is; there are better ones later on!!

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