Day 63 – I Quit

Word count: 532

 

 

The words were on the tip of her tongue. The decision hung on the tip of a sharp sword – the slightest movement and it would made, never to be undone. It was now or never. Every molecule in her was filled with an amalgamation of hated and rage. Everything they did, everything they said – it was all tainted by the thick cloud of utter loathing.

There was nothing more they could do to change her mind. Her mind was made up. She knew what she need and longed to do, but there was only one obstacle left in the way. It had been the hardest thing for her to do in the world; it had been the toughest of struggles and the hardest of emotional twists and turns. It had been hard; but it had failed. There was no stopping time. Dreams did not come true and there was not a chance in hell that opportunity would land in her lap. Her desires and wishes belonged in a world that she could not be a part of. They were someone else’s destiny; forever doomed to be her dream.

She’d been thinking about it for weeks, months. It was the only logical conclusion she could come up with. Things could not continue they way they were. There was no future in her actions. It was a cold, dark place the awaited her at the end of her journey. She needed out. She needed to break free before the grasping clutches of the entangled mess of darkness and insanity took a hold of her and warped her into the maddening soul she feared she would become.

She had to get out.

That morning she had woken up and realised that the decision had to be made that day. All her life she had been a quitter, this had been the longest thing she had ever committed to without failing and now she was falling down the old, familiar path once more. They were good friends, this road and her. They were like lovers destined to never be together, but yet to never live apart.

The words were failing her now. How could she let them escape the trap of her tongue without feeling the sting of regret and the finality of her failure? Could time heal her piteous soul? Would it even bother to wrench her from her constant state of in-existence or would it simply leave her to rot in her own pathetic world of past mistakes and dark regrets?

This was always going to be the hardest part. She had gathered her friends in one place and made them sit down in front of her. She would look them all in the eye and she would pause to reflect upon why she was here and the relief that might follow if she were to go through with it. They all gazed at her eagerly, as if anticipating something exciting, something positive. Something stuck at the back of her throat and attempted to steal her voice. The clotted lump of anguish tore at her heartstrings and tried to bite back the words that were finally being released from her lips….

“I quit.”

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~ by S.G. Mark on December 9, 2011.

One Response to “Day 63 – I Quit”

  1. Oooooooooeeeeoooo

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