Jupiter’s Children – First Chapter, First Paragraph
First draft of the first paragraph of the first chapter. I don’t think I’ll end up keeping it. It didn’t flow right.
Writer’s block?
The beautiful giant who devoured more than half the celestial encrusted sky smiled with the soft hue of the Sun’s cold and distant rays. A black shadow wrapped around the gas giant like a silky shoal and melted into the darkness of space itself as smoothly as oil. The planet herself with her sandstone bands of immeasurable size, sung her song out to the rest of her solar system. The wild heart of the woman, the savage surface and the crushing power were but a twinkling of bright white light hanging in a sea of sparkling jewels; but here, millions of miles away, she watched over all her children equally and never let them leave her sight.
~ by S.G. Mark on January 7, 2013.
Posted in Previous Stories
Three-hundred-and-sixty-five-stories 
Gorgeous, wow… Just please don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater… this visual and this mood and figurative reference are verging on sublime.
handinspace – what a lovely comment! Very encouraging, perhaps I will keep it after all! 🙂